October 27, 2018
(inspired by A Star is Born and some personal experience)
Why do we need the booze
The pills
The strawberry cheese cake (the whole fucking thing)
The pot
The wine
The Goddamn beer
Why can't we just be vulnerable
Naked and sober and boring as fuck?
Because we think we will be boring as fuck
Not good enough to fuck
Or make love to
Or appreciate
Or care for
Or love
We think we will not be worthy just as we are,
With eyes wide open.
We are yawnable
Without a scotch on the rocks
Without a gin and tonic
Without a frosty margarita or a rum and coke
Without a big drag on a long spliff to make us seem more sexy
At least to ourselves
What is wrong with us
That we can live our entire life through this much pain?
That we constrict who we are
So tight that we cannot breathe
So shallow that we cannot swim
So broken that we cannot mend
Holding our breath
Waiting until sundown
For the day to be over
So can think about loving
Before passing out
At the bottom of a
Goddamn barrel.
(Featured image thanks to Ibrahim Rifath on Unsplash)
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