November 20, 2018
Why is it so hard to love you
And just be me?
Is it just because you want me to be something else
I could never be
Or is the illusion inside me
Is it that
I want me to be something else
When I am with you
Less loud, less harsh, less in your face
Quiet demure subtle
Gentle flowing graceful (ha!)
Although I am rarely any of those things
I am more of a bull in a china shop
The elephant in the room
In your face and
Laughing out loud
I cry often
And at very inopportune times
I am a river after winter
And that is much too much too much
For most anyone
To stand for too long
Is there some place I can sneak off to
Without anyone ever knowing?
Where I can be me
And not hide behind a shell
Of this tiny frame
Where I can be large
And obnoxious
And free
And still
Someone
Anyone!
Would want to hug me
And say
That I am beautiful
Because of the way I am
Not in spite of it